Happy 2nd Birthday Grey!
- kim.rudness
- Nov 7, 2021
- 8 min read
2 years ago today, Adam and I welcomed Greyson Kent Rudness into this world. He came 7 weeks early but was ready to be in our arms. He was a tiny boy, but had lungs that let us know he was ok right away.
On November 6th 2019, I worked 8:30am-6:30pm and I came home and just plopped in the recliner. My feet and ankles were swollen, my legs and knees were sore, and my back was hurting. My back hadn't been hurting during my pregnancy before so I figured it was just my growing belly adding strain today after a long day. I went and laid in our bed and watched Superstore on my iPad. I was having some pretty dull but long cramping pain and figured it was Braxton hicks. It was around midnight when Adam came in the room to head to bed. By then the cramps had gotten worse and were just constant. He started to put his jammies on and stopped, but his jeans back on and said "Go get in the car. You're 8months pregnant and any pain isn't ok, go get in the car". I was so worried about going to the ER just for them to tell me it was Braxton hicks or that I had to go poop or something silly.
Well, we drove to the ER which was about 10 minutes away. The whole drive I was SO uncomfortable and every bump Adam drove over felt like someone was pulling my insides into a knot. It got worse over the drive. He dropped me off at the door and went to park. I checked in and as soon as I said "I'm 8months pregnant and I'm having some pretty strong cramping pain" she was on the phone with labor and delivery. Adam came in and we walked to the elevator and they got me into the triage room. They had me get a gown on and they strapped me into the fetal heart monitor. The nurse was a younger girl and she looked at me and said "yup, you're in labor!".
My heart sank and I remember the fear welling up in my throat. He's too little! I'm not ready! I didn't even pack my hospital bag yet. I didn't have any newborn clothes.. I think I had one outfit but it wasn't very warm. I didn't even have the car seat installed in my car yet. The on call doctor came in and let me know that they were going to go ahead and try and stop the labor with some medications but she was going to give me a steroid shot first to help Grey's lungs develop. I told her whatever you need to do- you do it. She gave me the shot in my butt and I took the medication to try and stop my contractions. This was probably around 1am-2am. The medication to slow the contractions was an oral pill that you'd take and then you'd take another one a few hours after. Well the first pill slowed the contractions down but by the time the second pill was supposed to be given, my contractions were full blown and they told us to call our family if they wanted to be here when he was born.
I honestly don't remember much of the night. I don't remember when they moved us to our birthing suite but I do remember realizing how big it was once we were settled. They had Grey's little bassinet ready to go, and at some point the NICU doctor came in to explain to us what may be a possibility because Greyson was coming so early. She was concerned about his lungs not being fully developed, his heart, his eyes, etc. She was talking for what felt like an eternity when I told Adam I couldn't focus and I need him to listen for the both of us. I was in so much pain that I just couldn't listen to her. I knew what she was telling us was important but I just couldn't handle listening and my contractions at the same time. I also remember telling Adam multiple times that I couldn't do this anymore. I was in so much pain. The nurse change came at 7am and my new nurse was all business. She came in and asked if I wanted an epidural or if I wanted to do a natural birth. Nope, no freaking way.. give me the epidural. So she left to get that ordered and we waited until around 9am to FINALLY get the epidural. The labor and delivery floor was full that day so I know it wasn't her but I was not happy that I didn't get it sooner. The doctor who placed my epidural was such a jerk too. He was the only staff member during my birth who was not wonderful. He was so condescending and had to poke me 3 times before he got it. He kept telling me not to move. I kept telling him I KNOW, I'M IN LABOR AND IT FREAKING HURTS. When he finally got it in, he said "good job" very sarcastically and rolled his eyes. Thankfully, I couldn't see him because I would've said something. Once the epidural was in, I was finally able to rest. We turned on hgtv and both just fell asleep. Our L&D doctor came in around 10:45am to check if my water broke, It broke naturally right as he was checking me! He looked at me and said "are you ready to be a Mommy?"
The quickly flipped the room and prepped it for me giving birth. I remember thinking "I'm not ready for this!" I wasn't ready for Grey to be here yet. He's not ready to be out, he's not done growing. I was frustrated with my body and immediately began to tear up. Adam was there supporting me the whole time and he looked at me and I felt like ok, WE can do this. They got me ready to push and the first push I didn't really push. I was scared thinking maybe he would just stay. (I know, it's dumb, but I was scared!) So the second time I really pushed. The doctor said "I need only one more push and he'll be out", so I pushed again. Then this pressure and relief- and this loud cry of our son. He cried so loud and we both just started crying. Our baby boy cried. He's ok! I made Adam go check on him while they cleaned him and checked him. Adam got pictures and they swaddled him and handed him to me and said "Happy Birthday little man" and I couldn't believe it. Our son was here and my goodness he was SO handsome.
Grey spent 12 days in the NICU before he was able to come home with us. He was such a rockstar in there. Now my baby boy is 2 years old. I can't believe how fast time has gone and how much he's grown.
Here are some pictures from his 1st year of life until now :) Such a peanut!
I can't believe how much he has changed over the past two years. How much he has gone through.
Saturday we had Greyson's birthday party for our family. Adam Dad (Steve) and his fiancé (Jill), Adam's sister (Courtney), my parents (Bob and Barb), and Adam's Great Uncle Don and his wife Roberta all came over to our house yesterday to celebrate our little man. We decided his theme would be "Two Infinity and Beyond". I made him a birthday shirt and made everyone who came matching shirts!
Auntie Courtney helped me get them done yesterday. It was a fun project :) We decorated with some fun balloons, streamers, and a banner I got off Amazon. We also got a fun cake from Walmart with a cake topper from Amazon too.
Then we had a nice time catching up and watching some football with everyone. We had pizza and opened his gifts together :)
And we each took turns with the birthday boy.
Adam and I
Grandpa Steve and Grandma Jill
Auntie Courtney
Nana and Papa
Great Uncle Don and Roberta (last one is Great Uncle Don, Steve, Adam, and Grey)
The cake had blue frosting and turned our tongues and teeth blue! Grey even had some frosting.
It was a wonderful party with family and Grey was tuckered out after (and during). It's been an interesting 2 years with Grey and this year has been incredibly difficult but he's such an amazing little boy and I feel so lucky to be his Mom. He's taught me so much this past two years.
I worked Thursday and Adam sent me a picture of Grey from the same day last year. He was sitting up in his highchair, holding his head up, playing with his toy laptop. Looking back at that made me really emotional. I had to step away and let the tears flow in private until I could calm down. It was really hard to see how much he has really lost in a year. He can't do any of those things anymore.. something simple like holding his head up.. tay-sachs took that from him in such a short period of time. This is the photo Adam sent.
Thursday after work- I had a wonderful distraction from my emotions. Courtney came into town and we went to the Childhood Safety Center's fundraiser which was designer purse bingo! I had my first adult beverages in MONTHS and had so much fun trying to win a designer purse. We didn't win anything (and we got a little bitter about that...) but it was still so fun.
Friday was prepping for Grey's party. Court and Adam ran some errands so that I could clean while Grey slept. Steve and Jill got here after work and we spent the night playing cards. Saturday morning was final party prep and getting the house ready. We celebrated with Grey and he was pretty tuckered out after. He went to bed and we played Ticket to Ride and then another round of cards. I headed up to bed and called it a night a little after midnight.
This morning Grey woke me up around 6:30am telling stories in his bed. I went in and picked him up and brought him in to our bed. He was so chatty! After his morning meds, I went to lay back down and just fell asleep hard. I slept in until 10am! I haven't done that in a long time! I came down stairs and Grey was zonked out on Grandpa Steve :)
It was a wonderful birthday weekend and today will be a snuggly day with our birthday boy. We will watch the Packer game, get some laundry done, and maybe go for a walk if it's warm enough today! Sounds like a perfect Sunday and birthday for Grey.
I've had a few people reach out again on how they can help us. We have been keeping Greyson's amazon wishlist updated as we need things for him. His link is here:
We also still have our gofundme. Right now, the gofundme is helping Adam and I take care of everything. From medical costs, to helping us keep afloat with bills- like mortgage, groceries, gas, insurance, etc. With us going from two full time incomes to one, this has helped us so much during this diagnosis. The link for that is here:
Another way to help us.. is honestly, share our story. Share our blog on social media or with your friends and family. We want to share Greyson's story and share the need for expanded genetic screening BEFORE you get pregnant. Tay-sachs is so rare and we had no idea this would be something we would be facing. We also have the "contact us" tab on the main menu of the blog, please feel free to ask questions, comments, or say hi to Grey!
Happy 2nd birthday GKR!
xoxo,
Kim
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